THIS IS HOW IT ALL BEGAN . . . Not With My Righteousness, but with HIS
THIS IS HOW IT ALL BEGAN . . .
August 2, 2009
As I knelt down, this morning, to offer my formal “opening prayer” for the day to Heavenly Father, I automatically (20 years of imperfect buy persistent repetition) reached for my pen and notepad. I had to smile as the recognition whispered through my mind: “This is how it all began.” And it is so true. It began with my hearing a prophet say that it was a good idea to bring something to write with when I prayed–if I really wanted to demonstrate to God my faith that He would truly hear me and answer me. This is where over 20 years and 1000s of pages of conversations with God began for me. Over the years, I have come to know the delightful difference in the tone and timbre or “voice print” in my spiritual ears of the Father and the Son’s words to me.
I always have to muse on the fact that all I had to do to know there were two individual Beings at the other end of my God-ward thoughts was to address my thoughts to either one or the other. The words that come back into my mind have the authority of God in them, as one with each other–but they “sound” (feel/sound) different to me. And they both make me smile with the wave of warmth and love the “sound” of their voice introduces into my soul. It’s exactly like being able to call home from the midst of a really hard mission and hear my most perfect, tender, loving Father’s or Brother’s voices. I’ve heard others’ “voices,” as well, on this line that the Holy Spirit quickens my mind and heart to perceive. I have to admit that it takes faith in the goodness of Christ and His offer of at-one-ness, to receive and believe what I “imagine” I perceive, but as I do I have been able to communicate “at the veil” with loved ones continuing on in that spiritual realm to seek and serve our beloved Jesus. And as to the authenticity of it, I have no way to prove it–except to invite those who know my story and can observe “the fruit” thereof–to observe and prayerfully decide for themselves. Was Colleen just making her spiritual experiences and the life based on them up or not?
Nevertheless, it all began with taking a prophet at his word about actually writing down the answers (words and impressions) that came in the midst of prayer. Doing that has taught me by my own lived experience that Moses’ words in Numbers 11:29 are still true today. God still would that all his people knew His voice one-on-one, personally enough to be prophets. Any true prophet is thrilled to know others are coming to know the voice of the Lord this personally for themselves. Like Moses any true prophet would ask, “[Why] enviest thou for my sake?” if anyone tried to curtail revelation to just themselves. God would that all His people were experiencing a direct relationship based on two way honest communication–and there are no exceptions to this invitation. “Come unto me, all ye that are heavy laden, . . .” “Counsel with me in all your doings . . .” “It is not the well that need a physician, but the unwell, . . .” There’s no end to His words inviting all and excluding none. It is ever and always the Liar’s influence that tries to persuade us to limit the Savior’s perfect and infinite condescension (willingness to meet us in our “stuff”) and walk and talk us out of the darkness into ever increasing light–until we have reached the perfect day–due totally to His merits (mercy, grace, patience, long-suffering willingness to love even the most broken and wounded leper or sinner–either one.)
This is my testimony. It burns stronger with every passing year. As I continue to watch my own inventory unfold and feel braver and braver to be fearless and thorough about my past and present inventory and see my own imperfections–all I can actually, really see is HIM–HIS brillance, HIS glory, HIS goodness. HIM. Truly, my story is HIS story–the story of HIS righteousness and none of my own. I pray that every word I have ever recorded–and that may ever be published will be “Another Testament of Jesus Christ.” . . .
Colleen,
Your prayers are surely answered in this matter of what is recorded and published. I have never read one thing that you have shared that has not testified of Jesus and glorified our Father. Thanks for writing and sharing as much as you do. love, CB